When i look at you
it makes me wanna puke
scrawny bunch of slobs
dirty pack of dogs
smoke ya poxy joints
tripping out ya mind
lazy bunch of wasters
think you are headcases
middle class upbringing
safe secure background
always got ya way
end up in an ashtray
useless crusty we love you.
treat ya mum like shit
she don't give a shit
but i think ya wrong
but ya never wrong
influence the young
think ya really cool
wanna be like you
start to bunk off school
useless crusty we love you
you aint going nowhere
ya lives are full of shit
but you won't admit that
you're going down you fool.
I can't understand
the way you work your head
fuck you idiot
You're all dead.
useless crusty we love you
useless motherfuckin crusty beg off me and i'll stab your poodle
have a bath.
x
Wednesday 31 August 2011
Boy Racer lyrics by The Flying Medallions
In the seat of my brand new Escort
140 mile an hour she runs.
She can overtake Porsche's,drag race Ferrari's,
my only arch enemy is James Hunt that cunt.
Flames scorch my bonnet and wings
as furry dice keep me in style.
Blacked out windows,alloy wide wheels
drives all the pussy wild
Chorus
But there's one thing that drives us on
in that impossible dream
John Travolta and Olivia
Burning down that drainage ditch stream
Me and my bird sit on leopard skin seats
Trevor and trace across the glass.
My back seat racers doing their thing
with their eyes and ears up their ass
Sainsburys carpark on a Saturday night
is where we like to pull.
Plenty of poony well educated stuff,
trouble is my car's too full.
x
140 mile an hour she runs.
She can overtake Porsche's,drag race Ferrari's,
my only arch enemy is James Hunt that cunt.
Flames scorch my bonnet and wings
as furry dice keep me in style.
Blacked out windows,alloy wide wheels
drives all the pussy wild
Chorus
But there's one thing that drives us on
in that impossible dream
John Travolta and Olivia
Burning down that drainage ditch stream
Me and my bird sit on leopard skin seats
Trevor and trace across the glass.
My back seat racers doing their thing
with their eyes and ears up their ass
Sainsburys carpark on a Saturday night
is where we like to pull.
Plenty of poony well educated stuff,
trouble is my car's too full.
x
Saturday 20 August 2011
Letter to Pwos and Ad.
i just sent Aoife to Tescos to buy me 12 crispy creme donuts!
Fuck yes.
I'm gonna stuff my fuckin face.
I'm gonna seriously eat at least 4.
The 1st one i'm gonna ram in my gob WHOLE.
I DON'T GIVE A SHIT IF THE CHOCOLATE FILLING SPILLS OUT ONTO MY CHIN AND CHEEKS.
I DON'T GIVE A FUCK.
So that's what i'm doing anyway.
x
Fuck yes.
I'm gonna stuff my fuckin face.
I'm gonna seriously eat at least 4.
The 1st one i'm gonna ram in my gob WHOLE.
I DON'T GIVE A SHIT IF THE CHOCOLATE FILLING SPILLS OUT ONTO MY CHIN AND CHEEKS.
I DON'T GIVE A FUCK.
So that's what i'm doing anyway.
x
Saturday 13 August 2011
The Murderburgers,Wonk Unit,DeeCrack ,Emergency Bitter fuck up Camden
This is a show i'm putting on.
the reason it is on my blog is that the bullshit i wrote made me laugh.x
Sunday, October 9 · 2:00pm - 7:00pm
The Black Heart
2/3 Greenland Place
Camden Town, United Kingdom
The Murderburgers are from Glasgow.Don't be put off by this.They are friendly and i'll be on hand to translate any questions you may have for them.To make matters more difficult for us all,they'll be touring with DeeCracks from Austria!!Now i don't know how the fuck we are supposed to communicate with this bunch but hopefully they'll have there own translator.Maybe like one of those sign language people who stands in the corner of your telly when a deaf program is on.Yeah man,sign language Austrian translators are well cool.I reckon it will be a fit bird call Agatha.Yeahhhhh.Then there's Wonk Unit.Everyone loves wonk unit because of their amazingly lovable bass player The Pwosion.He is friends with the cast from Eastenders.Fuck the others,they are both cunts.I have asked Emergency Bitter to play.This is because they are men.Real men.Sensible,dependable,big chunky men.Who smile.And that is really the most important thing in life.Smiling.Even if you are fucking miserable.Many thanks.
PLEASE ALSO NOTE THAT THIS SHOW IS AN AFTERNOON SHOW.THIS IS BECAUSE WE WILL TRY TO TAKE ADVANTAGE OF THE HORDES OF DUSKY ITALIAN TOURISTS (FEMALE OF COURSE) WHO ROAM CAMDEN ON A WEEKEND LOOKING FOR ENGLISH COCK.YES.CAMDEN IS A COCK AND TIT FEST OF A WEEKEND AND THAT IS WHY WE LOVE IT.
the reason it is on my blog is that the bullshit i wrote made me laugh.x
Sunday, October 9 · 2:00pm - 7:00pm
The Black Heart
2/3 Greenland Place
Camden Town, United Kingdom
The Murderburgers are from Glasgow.Don't be put off by this.They are friendly and i'll be on hand to translate any questions you may have for them.To make matters more difficult for us all,they'll be touring with DeeCracks from Austria!!Now i don't know how the fuck we are supposed to communicate with this bunch but hopefully they'll have there own translator.Maybe like one of those sign language people who stands in the corner of your telly when a deaf program is on.Yeah man,sign language Austrian translators are well cool.I reckon it will be a fit bird call Agatha.Yeahhhhh.Then there's Wonk Unit.Everyone loves wonk unit because of their amazingly lovable bass player The Pwosion.He is friends with the cast from Eastenders.Fuck the others,they are both cunts.I have asked Emergency Bitter to play.This is because they are men.Real men.Sensible,dependable,big chunky men.Who smile.And that is really the most important thing in life.Smiling.Even if you are fucking miserable.Many thanks.
PLEASE ALSO NOTE THAT THIS SHOW IS AN AFTERNOON SHOW.THIS IS BECAUSE WE WILL TRY TO TAKE ADVANTAGE OF THE HORDES OF DUSKY ITALIAN TOURISTS (FEMALE OF COURSE) WHO ROAM CAMDEN ON A WEEKEND LOOKING FOR ENGLISH COCK.YES.CAMDEN IS A COCK AND TIT FEST OF A WEEKEND AND THAT IS WHY WE LOVE IT.
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